”I am sorry, I couldn’t be there for you when you were in the most need of me. I have failed as a mother”
“We have come out of it and come out strongly. This prooves you have been a great mother.”
My mother has been the bread bearer for our family. My dad had been home to take care of his two daughters. However, dad and his family made sure that me and my sister couldn’t make a single good memory from childhood. My mom never knew exactly what happened when she left. Only recently we told her about the cousin I slapped for molesting me, all of the mental torture that dad did etc. Her guilt for not being there for us then still cringes her heart and has a burst out quite often.
When I saw Salma’s mother in the documentary it immediately reminded me of mom. There was guilt in her eyes when she said yes I smuggled her poems. I could feel that she somewhere tried to make up for the mistake she did when she was 17.
I feel being a parent is the most difficult thing to do. You have to balance between making your child think rationally and socialising him into the religion your in laws would ask for. How is one supposed to bring up a kid with a rational mindset when the religion makes it so narrow? Salma I feel, couldn’t have done more to make her kids understand how the society is. The sight of her kids using Facebook while she read her poems made me cry out loud within. It was worse to see how her sister Najma’s kid explained the illogical religion so strongly.
It trembled my heart into pieces when Najma said, “I am bounded by his love.” She agreed she behaves differently around her son, feels more free when he isn’t around but still doesn’t wish to change how he thinks. My mother always knew my dad was wrong. She knew all the mental torture me and my sister would go through day in and out but never said a word. I guess she was bounded by his love too.
I feel each one of us learn from Salma at least this one thing. Inspite of all she faced she did something, wrote it down with everyone around against it. It can get difficult I know, it did for my mom too. It took several years for her to break the barrier of love she felt for dad and stand for me and my sister but she did.
Journeys do get tough but when you keep moving will you see the silver lining in this case Salma and also my mom saw.
(Salma has many layers to her life. The documentary named after her has captured each of it in the most beautiful way possible.The above text was what I learned from it. Try to watch it and do share with me what you felt about it.)